Clap.

Clap if your life sucks as much as mine does right now. Yay.... silence. Woot for being alone.

Yeah worst possible news was dilevered to me right beofre band. Yay. I think I may go run and hopefully not be raped by some stranger that likes unattractive teenagers, hmm possibly someone called a pedifile? yeah, that's it.

Dinner... I don't know if I want to eat, I know I need to, but I don't know if I want to. I've been like this for a while now.

What you do if I moved off to somewhere random, like London or New York? I have cousins in Germany and a cousin who modles in New York. That's be nice to have a guardian that was a modle. Then I could get (and dress in) the clothes I want.

I have s.s. crap to do, along with typing then emailing Rose my science project and studying for my s.s. test tomorrow annnnnd finishing that science annnnnnd studying math. Oh and also typing Kels that story, but Kels you'll just have to wait, because along with my studying I have to clean clothes and eat and clean the house and bathe.

I'ma worn yall, I'ma look like poopoo tomorrow.

I had to go into 'their' band class today right after I found out the news and I did some weird chest thing that's become a weird habit for me.

One more week after this one until they consider chagng my classes.

I have school and dance tommorrow, so myabe I won't run, just sit in the bathtub untill the water is freezing.

I was colorful today, although I feel I should have been dressed very duley.

My friends are trying to help me get out of this slump, but its not working. I found if I go and do things with my friends either a) I feel lonlier when I leave then when I came (and yes, it is possible) or b) I feel really good and happy but then once I leave in about 30 minutes I'm still back to the dying Olivia I am.

I'm just going to make it through the rest of the month and hopefuly my schedule will be changed and I'll have 1st period lunch with more of my friends where I'm not stared at by boy's who hate me, or know me just won't admit it. It gets rather sickening sometimes.

I hate this right now, cause yall are prolly thinking 'dude, she needs to get over herself and stop feeling sorry for herself and balah blah blah' and dudes, I'm completely with you. If only I could find a way how.

I haven't listened to BVB in about a week. Maybe I'm having some sort of withdrawl. We talked about tobbaco (again) in helath today, and guess what? I knew it all! woot for me.

I've been quite sarcastic and violent today, but my friends don't seem to mind (or atleast I don't think so). I had a weird dream, but I'm not really in the mood to tell you.

Yeah, I realize this is a really long post, but it's been a long time and I needed someone to tell this crap to. Even though I know the computer doesn't understand me , it's still nice to say it outloud.

I know I have tons of grammatical errors, but I don't care at all, so don't correct me. I would've edited it if I wanted to.

Off to wtch Harry Potter again and procrastinate from alll my work.

I 5 you more than you could ever scream,

Olivia.